Boys do really notice your shoes.

I think I might need to create a post/blog/list of my cast of characters. Shortly I shall.

Wow...just...wow.

A woman's gut don't lie, do it.

Oy, can I get a do over on that one. Can I take that back?

Lucky me...due to TheStudent's visa snafu he was in the US a little bit longer and I just happened to catch him on the phone the night before he left. Six months he'll be gone. That's not too long.

Why do I always want the guy who is unavailable?

MySpace, MySpace, MySpace...you're always telling on folks. Or should I say folks are always telling on themselves through you.

I needed to get out of the house...it seems the debauchery that is Gelo has thinned out of D'Vine a bit and they take themselves directly upstairs. There are a few stragglers, but they don't ever stay too long.

It was nice of J to stroke my hair for a bit. It was comforting.

TallMcHell just happened to be around and wouldn't you know it he knows TheParkRanger. Small ass Indianapolis. He hugged me nice and long and then lingered and held my hand and sat with me for a few. It was nice. Still quite done with him as I still ain't feeling his vibe.

I miss holding hands.

Dude, you're lame. No you can't be my sugar daddy. I peeped the wedding band on your finger when you first sat down. One.) You're not that attractive, seriously it's 2007 and you've got a box, Bee.) You're trying to holla at me through my friend...via text message. I don't care how paid you are. You can't do anything for me.

Glad to see I still have some morals.

I ran into a crush from over a year ago. *laughs* Ms:Red had tried to set us up while she was in all the way FL...and then one day I took matters into my own hands and asked him out. A first for me. He accepted...and then stood me up. Stupid boys. He was looking extra good. I'm sorry to hear that his life is in the shits as well. That crush was rekindled as we chatted for a minute. I can only hope that I'll run into him again soon and that one of us will have good news. He told me even with life as it right now that I'm still blessed. And he's right. I have a roof over my head, a job and people who care about me. Maybe that's why I ran into him...so he could tell me just that.

To top off the night I got to deal with TheParkRanger who was not drunk enough to stop off at Marsh to send me in to buy him a cheesecake, but too drunk to drive himself the rest of the way home. Hilarious. I feel bad for Krys who was rudely awakened at almost 3AM who being the good friend that she is got dressed and drove all the way over from Speedway to pick him up. She's a good one.

Ugh!!! Calling in right when your shift starts to say you're going to be an hour and a half late and then not showing up...come on.

Shit I can't seem to keep ahold of these stupid mouth pieces. I just wanna smoke the hooka damn it.

Mmmmm...sweet melon.

Fuck it's cold outside.

Hooka bar is not the strip club and belly dancers are not strippers...there's no need to make it rain like that for them.

I don't know why I play this game with TheLiar, but it sure is entertaining.

TI is in the building...oh wait...that's just some dude who thinks he looks like TI. Dude...the sun is not out take of the shades.

Boys do really notice your shoes.

I love to see 2Deep get hype when he's on the 1's and 2's.

Those are not my people. *peers out over the DJ booth to watch the Asian's dancing off beat and wildly to Crank That and Hand Clap*

Too many Asians in one place make me uncomfortable.

Who the fuck makes bootleg condoms? I know you wanna make a buck...but come on.

How do you stop crushing on/being attracted to (NOT J. Dilla's definition of crushing) that one person you know is unavailble to you for one reason or another?

Today was not a good day.

I can't handle all these emotions right now, they're ALL over the place. Sometimes I feel okay and then two seconds later I dive deep into sadness and frustration. For a brief moment I thought about cutting. I feel like such a burden to those around me right now...and that no one cares. (I know people do care...but I don't always feel like they do, it's one of my own beasts that I've created.) I scroll through my phone to find someone who I can talk to and can't find anyone who I think will understand and want to listen. Or the one person that I can talk to, TheBestFriend, is unavailable. When does it start getting better?

I need out.