Saturday, October 14, 2006

That Guy

I "met" DW the beginning of August 2005 on  I was a day new and browsing profiles and just happened to bookmark his profile not knowing it would instantly send him a message alerting him to the bookmark I just made.  Shortly there after a message window pops open and there he is, just back from summer school in Paris.  What made him decide to click on the "Click to Chat" link that would be the beginning of many conversations.  He asked me what it was about his profile that deserved a bookmark.  I was a little embarassed that he knew I bookmarked him and said I was new and had no idea it would alert him.  Our conversation was short and wasn't about much, but I was already drawn to him.

We chatted a bit over the next couple of days just the basic getting to know you conversations.  I was excited.  He sent me his phone number, but I knew I wouldn't call.  I don't know why, but I don't like to make the first call.  So in return I gave him my number.  He called and my first thought about his voice made me laugh.  We talked for about two minutes as he was on his way home.  We didn't talk again for almost a month.

Finally when we had or real first conversation we talked for over an hour.  It was just very comfortable.  He even talked about coming to visit and even spending Christmas with me.  It was amazing how well we got along on the phone.  Laughing and chatting.

He soon started to send the sweetest text messages telling me he was thinking about me and that he missed me.  He would often ask if I missed him and I always said how could I miss someone I'd never met.  In a way I did miss him, but I would never say it.  I longed to meet him and have him hold me in his arms.

Once in a while he'd sort of disappear for a couple of weeks at a time, but we had talked about how sometimes he does that to get away from things and people.  It was okay, I knew he was busy working on his dreams.  I knew from our conversations that this man is destined for greatness.  I can hear it in his voice and see it in his actions and the path that he's on.

I slowly started to fall for him.  He became the one I could see myself picking up my life and going to be with.  We had even hypothetically discussed moving to be together.  I'd never felt that way about anyone.  I never thought I would feel that way about someone.  I didn't want to be that girl.

Our conversations were always so relaxing.  When we spoke I was automatically put at ease.  I could go from highly stressed and unable to sleep to completely relaxed and ready to sleep the night away.  I would sometimes only get 3 or 4 hours of sleep after our late conversations, but always feel like I'd gotten at least 8 hours.  It was like...magic.  Sounds corny, but that's just how it was.

This summer our conversations died.  He was in Italy for part of the summer and then had an internship in Seattle and we lost touch.  But when school started back, he popped back up.  It's still not quite the same.  We don't talk often.  It's his last year of college and I understand that he's busy.  But I miss him and I miss our conversations.

I still find it difficult to wrap my brain around the "relationship" we have over the phone/internet.  How is it possible to grow close to someone in such a way that you've never physically met.  It doesn't make sense.  But I'm glad that I did bookmark his profile that day.  Even if we never meet, I'm still glad that we became friends and I can only hope that our friendship is one that lasts a lifetime.

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